Okay, so today I faced one of my biggest fears.... I went to the dentist and let them pull out 4 of my teeth. They had to put me to sleep to do it, but I still had to walk in there, and have faith that God was going to make it all okay. And He did!! God made it all go okay, so far I've had minimal pain, and have had only a little bit of bleeding!! So I'm hoping that by tomorrow, or by the end of the week, I will be perfectly good, and can start moving on again.
Travis and I have decided that Cindy is going to be staying with us, and that Yes we are going to help her. So she has volunteered to go through Wounded Hearts, and has agreed to start talking to Nita, and so I am hoping that she can start to live the truth as we are... I really think that it would be a good thing for her, and for us as well.
Our relationship has been a little rocky lately, and its been hard to regroup and to figure things out together, however I am finding more and more peace within myself. Having to depend on Travis to make the right decisions is strange, but I know that he will learn, as we all learn how to grow up and to make sure that your a good half of the relationship. However, since Cindy has been here, we have found ourselves talking more, and working together more. So maybe, this really is a blessing from God.
So I will be doing 2 Book Studys, and Wounded Heart, while Travis will be doing Pure, and Wounded Heart. Cindy will be doing Wounded Heart.. So were going to have 3 Wounded Heart people, and so I'm hoping that God has got a plan for all of this, because its going to be a lot of tears, and were all going to need strength to get through this!!
Travis has got an interview on Thursday for Burger King, and he had a job offer to make the Steelers Super Bowl towels but turned that down, we have Child Support court in the next few weeks, and so we are hoping and praying that the judge will hopefully have mercy on us. Its strange but for some reason I have a feeling that this is all going to take a turn for the better. I'm serious, I feel as though God has a plan, and that this is all going to take a turn!! So with that said...
I am still battling, personally I am battling, with the diet thing. I mean in my mind, its like why even bother? Why lose the weight? Why keep tracking points when I am so bad at it? Etc... So this week, I'm going to focus on getting us all organized, and sorted out. Seriously. Tomorrow when we get home from all of our appointments, and meetings, I am going to attack our organization.. Tonight I'm going to make a checklist, and I'm not going to stop, until I get the checklist done. I am going to make a calendar, figure out the bills, etc. I am completely and utterly serious about getting this whole house in order, and things sorted out, cleaned, organized, and setup... Some things will have to go to the garbage can, and other things will have to be given away, but I think, and honestly believe that if I work hard enough at getting us all sorted out and organized, then I will have more energy to get my exercises, and dieting back in order.. I have just got to let go.. I mean seriously, I have got to get things organized, and sorted out, and let go...
"Sweet Father, I am sitting here knowing that you have a plan for us. You've got a plan about all of us going through Wounded Heart, and all of us healing during this cold winter season. Father I know that you brought Cindy to us, to show us what our purpose is for right now. Father I ask that you please bless Tanya, and her friends, please show them that they are living the wrong way, and please make something happen that will guide them to your open arms. Father I know that Tanya is a good kid, but has just been misdirected. Father, I ask that you please guide Cindy, and let her know that you are with her. Father I ask that you please guide me, and help me to get on diet, and stick with it. Father I have been struggling with becoming the woman I know that I am inside, so please Father, help me with that struggle. Father I pray that you please help us get Gabby more often than once a week, and allow her to come stay with us once Cindy is on her feet. Father please help Cindy to get motivated to change her life, and how she sees herself. Father I know that Cindy is all up for shopping, and eating, I know that her and I are battling with the same problems, so Father please guide both of us!! Father I thank you for Nita, and my girls, oh what an inspiration they are all to me... Father I love you, and thank You for all that You have done for us.. I love you Father, In Jesus' Name Amen."
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