Okay, so the last few days has been really nutso for me.. So I have completely dehydrated myself I think. When I got up this morning, I was so tired, and icky feeling, that I have yet to get anything except for school work done. Since I've eaten, and have been drinking some water, I am starting to feel a bit better.. I think that the last few days I have over done it.. :)
So my plan for the rest of today, is I"m going to get the Kitchen cleaned up, and the Living room cleaned up, and I'm going to definately get the spare room cleaned up. I'm also going to be exercising today.. I'm going to do my Biggest Loser workout, week 2.. :) I think thats the one I'm going to do.. I am also wanting to do some more swimming tomorrow, and do my aerobic step workout either tonight or tomorrow morning. I'm really hoping to be able to do some bike riding too.. I'm hoping to get the rest of my work done tomorrow as well.. I'm hoping that by drinking more water and by eating some food, then I should be able to go all the way tomorrow!! Hopefully so anyway..
I've lost a few pounds within the last few days.. So I'm hoping to keep the trend going, to eat, and drink and to lose some weight.. :) Well I'm going to go, and get some stuff going for tonight.. :D
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
Sunday, July 3, 2011
Another Blessed Day...
Well here it is almost 6'o clock in the evening and it has been one heck of a day!! In all seriousness!! :D So we got up in the morning, and took nutmeg for a walk, then after that we went to Ray's beach and went swimming! That was such a blast, I haven't been swimming for a few years now, so that was awesomely fun! We went there, and swam around for 3 and a half hours!! It was soo fun! I did however get sunburned even though I was wearing sun-block. *sigh* Ah well, I guess that will just have to be something that I deal with every summer, is getting burned.. Then we came home, and Travis was actually yiffy!! So we yiffed, then grilled out.. So with that said, here I am sitting here, to rest for a few minutes, then I'm going to put the food and stuff away, and do another bible study, and read the bible and stuff again.. I've found that I'm perfectly at peace knowing, that God is at work, in our lives, and that means that things are changing for us, we will have our bad days and our good days, however, we need to work on getting the good days to out number the bad ones.. :D
Mac is wanting to also go to a movie later on, when we get done at the Garden, however I am not feeling up to going to a movie tonight. He and Travis can go, I just don't want too.. I mean I've got work tomorrow, so I want to rest, and just have a nice day.. :) Besides, I haven't been to a movie in a very long time, and I don't know that I could handle the noise, or the whole theatre scene.. Ya know? Mac is at home right now watching Dr. Who... Its a good show, I'm going to watch it as well here I think, however I"m not entirely sure that I'm going to have much energy here tonight.. I think that around 10, I'm going to head to bed.. After I setup my plan for tomorrow!! I am really getting in the hang of this school thing, and the swimming, was an awesome way to exercise!! I really hope that I am still losing weight.. Actually, I'm going to go check, right now.. BRB..
Okay, so I've gained 4 lbs, however, that 4 lbs is going to go oh so quickly once I start working out this week. So since I'm already in the habit of doing school work everyday, I'm going to add a workout time, also I'm going to be adding a bible study time in everyday for a week, so that way I am creating an awesomely awesome evened out daily schedule of sorts.. :) I'm really happy to say that I think that our lives are finally turning around, and things are finally getting better.. I'm growing and changing and I can feel it, I can sense it, and I'm aware of it... :) Whoooo Hoooooo!!! :D Well I guess I'm going to go, and I will post more later on, if I don't fall asleep!! :D
Mac is wanting to also go to a movie later on, when we get done at the Garden, however I am not feeling up to going to a movie tonight. He and Travis can go, I just don't want too.. I mean I've got work tomorrow, so I want to rest, and just have a nice day.. :) Besides, I haven't been to a movie in a very long time, and I don't know that I could handle the noise, or the whole theatre scene.. Ya know? Mac is at home right now watching Dr. Who... Its a good show, I'm going to watch it as well here I think, however I"m not entirely sure that I'm going to have much energy here tonight.. I think that around 10, I'm going to head to bed.. After I setup my plan for tomorrow!! I am really getting in the hang of this school thing, and the swimming, was an awesome way to exercise!! I really hope that I am still losing weight.. Actually, I'm going to go check, right now.. BRB..
Okay, so I've gained 4 lbs, however, that 4 lbs is going to go oh so quickly once I start working out this week. So since I'm already in the habit of doing school work everyday, I'm going to add a workout time, also I'm going to be adding a bible study time in everyday for a week, so that way I am creating an awesomely awesome evened out daily schedule of sorts.. :) I'm really happy to say that I think that our lives are finally turning around, and things are finally getting better.. I'm growing and changing and I can feel it, I can sense it, and I'm aware of it... :) Whoooo Hoooooo!!! :D Well I guess I'm going to go, and I will post more later on, if I don't fall asleep!! :D
A wonderful day..
So today, I had an awesome day.. Well technically it would be yesterday since its past midnight, however I am still talking as though its today, since I haven't fallen alseep yet.
So today we picked up Christopher and Anthony. We had such a good day. So the kids from across the way came over and we had a party. We watched some TV, and Anthony got to play with the kids. He got to drive the little cars that they have, and we had a cookout, where all the kids ate a few things. And we got their slip and slide thing over here, and they got to play with that as well.. Anthony really liked that, and Travis went down the slip and slide twice.. So it was a really good day. Christopher got to spend some time outside, and was able to get a chance to be around people, and to do things like a normal baby does. So with that, it was an awesome day for us here, since it was exactly how I'd want my day to be. With kids every where, and I was able to socialize with their moms, and it was really nice. Travis didn't like it, he complained about the other kids being here.. Isn't that sad and pathetic?
So tomorrow, we are going to the beach and going to swim and stuff a little bit. Then were going to come back home, and are going to grill out and stuff. So its going to be another really good day. I'm really happy for that. I am totally excited about being able to go swimming finally!
I am a bit troubled however, about Travis not being able to be happy and enjoy this weekend. We are having a really nice and awesome weekend, however he is miserable. He acts as though its a terrible thing to have kids here, and to be able to laugh, and just sit back and enjoy things. He hasn't even noticed how much I've changed since he has left and come back. so he claims that I'm a drama queen, and acts as though I'm such a terrible person. He seems to be attracted to people who are obvious losers. Why? I'm not entirely sure, other than the fact that he is currently in the same boat that they are.. I wonder if there is a secret club that they all joined, and he is just hanging out with fellow club members? LOL.
So tomorrow, is going to be a day of knowing that God is with us, and so I'm going to do my bible study, and am going to be really blessed and happy knowing that God has blessed us with so much. I'm going to start re-adjusting my daily schedule this week, with tomorrow, so its going to be a busy yet, relaxing day.. :D Completely and totally full of happiness!
Well its 2:30 in the morning so I'm going to head to bed, so that I can get some sleep before our day tomorrow. So goodnight for now.. :)
So today we picked up Christopher and Anthony. We had such a good day. So the kids from across the way came over and we had a party. We watched some TV, and Anthony got to play with the kids. He got to drive the little cars that they have, and we had a cookout, where all the kids ate a few things. And we got their slip and slide thing over here, and they got to play with that as well.. Anthony really liked that, and Travis went down the slip and slide twice.. So it was a really good day. Christopher got to spend some time outside, and was able to get a chance to be around people, and to do things like a normal baby does. So with that, it was an awesome day for us here, since it was exactly how I'd want my day to be. With kids every where, and I was able to socialize with their moms, and it was really nice. Travis didn't like it, he complained about the other kids being here.. Isn't that sad and pathetic?
So tomorrow, we are going to the beach and going to swim and stuff a little bit. Then were going to come back home, and are going to grill out and stuff. So its going to be another really good day. I'm really happy for that. I am totally excited about being able to go swimming finally!
I am a bit troubled however, about Travis not being able to be happy and enjoy this weekend. We are having a really nice and awesome weekend, however he is miserable. He acts as though its a terrible thing to have kids here, and to be able to laugh, and just sit back and enjoy things. He hasn't even noticed how much I've changed since he has left and come back. so he claims that I'm a drama queen, and acts as though I'm such a terrible person. He seems to be attracted to people who are obvious losers. Why? I'm not entirely sure, other than the fact that he is currently in the same boat that they are.. I wonder if there is a secret club that they all joined, and he is just hanging out with fellow club members? LOL.
So tomorrow, is going to be a day of knowing that God is with us, and so I'm going to do my bible study, and am going to be really blessed and happy knowing that God has blessed us with so much. I'm going to start re-adjusting my daily schedule this week, with tomorrow, so its going to be a busy yet, relaxing day.. :D Completely and totally full of happiness!
Well its 2:30 in the morning so I'm going to head to bed, so that I can get some sleep before our day tomorrow. So goodnight for now.. :)
Friday, July 1, 2011
Catch up...
So this entire week has been a game of catch up for me.. I started my school this week, and might have bitten off more than I could chew, but I've got it all done and over with now. I'm really hoping that next week it isn't so bad for me, since the school week starts on Sunday, I'm a bit nervous about what that means for me and my schedule of how I"m doing things. I have noticed however that my bible studies have lacked greatly, in fact I haven't been doing them at all, so tomorrow, I'm planning on doing those instead of homework in the evening. Tomorrow we are babysitting Anthony and Christopher, so the house needs to be clean and all of that kind of stuff, ya know? I was supposed to go to lunch with Hannah tomorrow, however that was cancelled and will probably be moved to Tuesday of next week..
So tonight I am going to do some bible studies before bed, and do some prayer. I am also going to do some picking up and cleaning up, since I get to sleep in tomorrow, which will be really nice to do! I was hoping to go to a movie with Mac tomorrow, however that has to be moved maybe, well unless Mac is able to get new tickets, then the kids could go with us.. I think that Anthony might like to go to the movies, and watch the movie, and stuff ya know? We will have to wait and see.. :) Maybe Mac and Travis could go, and leave the kids here with me. I can feel myself changing when it comes to children, I can feel a more settled aspect of my mothering instincts coming out, I have no idea as to why, but am hoping that God will show us why here in a while. I am hoping to do a nice step workout tomorrow, and am hoping to go for a few walks with the kids tomorrow, and maybe have Anthony play with the kids from across the way and be able to really interact with some new kids, I hope that he can make some new friends..
So for the rest of the day today, I'm going to be relaxing and then going to do some cleaning, and will hopefully be able to do some of my bible studies.. Its so weird, how when you stop doing something, but then suddenly start to miss it, how you end up making excuses as to why you aren't doing it anymore or why you aren't going to start doing it again. So with that said, since I am adjusting to school work just fine, I am going to be forcing myself to re-adjust to cleaning up, and exercising and including my daily bible studies. I think that it'll be a good thing for me to get used to doing things alone, since Travis is still in his depression. :)
So with that said, I'm going to be thinking about things here.. For tomorrow, I'm going to be getting up a bit earlier, and am going to get my bible studies done, and then will get the cleaning done, and will send Travis to go get Anthony and Christopher. I hope to be able to get some cleaning done, and things before they get here, then I will make some lunch and stuff, and it'll be awesome possum.. I can do some exercising and stuff.. :-)
Alright well I'm going to go and rest a bit more.. And be done with it... I will hopefully post more tomorrow, when I'm rested, and ready to go...
So tonight I am going to do some bible studies before bed, and do some prayer. I am also going to do some picking up and cleaning up, since I get to sleep in tomorrow, which will be really nice to do! I was hoping to go to a movie with Mac tomorrow, however that has to be moved maybe, well unless Mac is able to get new tickets, then the kids could go with us.. I think that Anthony might like to go to the movies, and watch the movie, and stuff ya know? We will have to wait and see.. :) Maybe Mac and Travis could go, and leave the kids here with me. I can feel myself changing when it comes to children, I can feel a more settled aspect of my mothering instincts coming out, I have no idea as to why, but am hoping that God will show us why here in a while. I am hoping to do a nice step workout tomorrow, and am hoping to go for a few walks with the kids tomorrow, and maybe have Anthony play with the kids from across the way and be able to really interact with some new kids, I hope that he can make some new friends..
So for the rest of the day today, I'm going to be relaxing and then going to do some cleaning, and will hopefully be able to do some of my bible studies.. Its so weird, how when you stop doing something, but then suddenly start to miss it, how you end up making excuses as to why you aren't doing it anymore or why you aren't going to start doing it again. So with that said, since I am adjusting to school work just fine, I am going to be forcing myself to re-adjust to cleaning up, and exercising and including my daily bible studies. I think that it'll be a good thing for me to get used to doing things alone, since Travis is still in his depression. :)
So with that said, I'm going to be thinking about things here.. For tomorrow, I'm going to be getting up a bit earlier, and am going to get my bible studies done, and then will get the cleaning done, and will send Travis to go get Anthony and Christopher. I hope to be able to get some cleaning done, and things before they get here, then I will make some lunch and stuff, and it'll be awesome possum.. I can do some exercising and stuff.. :-)
Alright well I'm going to go and rest a bit more.. And be done with it... I will hopefully post more tomorrow, when I'm rested, and ready to go...
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
Marital Frustrations...
Alright, so tonight, I'm exhausted.. Completely and utterly tired.. Or well, so I thought.. I'm so Yiffy, its like an unstoppable train, which most husbands would rejoice about right? Well apparently not mine. Travis is completely denying anything. For the record this isn't the first time that he has refused to touch me. Hell, he refuses to even kiss me passionately, its all about pecks.. There is no passion or love in his kisses or his touch.. Its like I am a live in maid, who just so happens to pay for everything for him as well.. I have felt upset about this sort of treatment from him before, however for some reason I believed that it would be different, for some reason, I thought that he'd want me.. For some reason, I thought that he loved me enough to wanna touch me, at least once.. At least for a few seconds.. But instead, what I got was a cold denial.. So here I am wanting to ball my eyes out, cuz my husband once again would rather do anything else other than touch me..
With that said, tonight, I'm going to be staying up late, since I can't seem to sleep without his touch. Ya know, he refuses to even come to bed!! He won't sleep with me, and doesn't say that he loves me very much anymore. I feel myself falling outta love with him. Its like I am attracted to him, but without that intimacy there is no desire to continue to be with him.. Its like I'm staying with him outta routine, and convenience, instead of love, which I know is very wrong at this point, so we will have to see what the day brings.. Won't we?
So I've decided to start using Microsoft works if he has it on here, to start planning out my days, and to make sure that I have things planned out for that day, instead of procrastinating, and wasting time doing other things.. I have so many things that I need to get done everyday, I'm falling behind on everything, including laundry.. I think that I'm only going to wash my laundry, since Travis has got more than enough clothes and stuff to last him until next week.. It might sound mean, but ya know what? He doesn't seem to care whether he is clean or not, so whats the point anymore?!
With that said, I'm doing okay.. I've worn myself out.. I'm so tired, yet can't seem to sleep. Its a strange position to be in.. Its like in my mind, I have tons of things that I'd like to do. For instance, I'd like to go for a walk, I'd like to learn to jog, I'd like to start doing my aerobic step and stuff again.. I miss it!! So with that said, I think that tomorrow, I'm going to do it again.. Why? Why not?! I'd like to do it.. :-) Well I'm going to sit down, and take a look at my classes, and whats due tomorrow, and setup a schedule based on whats going on tomorrow.. I haven't heard from Nita, so I'm assuming that we won't be meeting on Thursday, instead I'll be meeting with Hannah on Saturday!! I"m so excited about that!! Whoo Hooo!!! :D
Well I guess I will be posting more, as the night goes on... :) For some reason, I feel as though we are going to get a surprise sometime soon here.. I hope its a good surprise, cuz if not, I'll have to kill someone!! ROFL.. As if I could do that... Anyway I'm going to go, and figure out my plan for tomorrow.. As I said, if I need too, I'll be posting more tonight.. :d
With that said, tonight, I'm going to be staying up late, since I can't seem to sleep without his touch. Ya know, he refuses to even come to bed!! He won't sleep with me, and doesn't say that he loves me very much anymore. I feel myself falling outta love with him. Its like I am attracted to him, but without that intimacy there is no desire to continue to be with him.. Its like I'm staying with him outta routine, and convenience, instead of love, which I know is very wrong at this point, so we will have to see what the day brings.. Won't we?
So I've decided to start using Microsoft works if he has it on here, to start planning out my days, and to make sure that I have things planned out for that day, instead of procrastinating, and wasting time doing other things.. I have so many things that I need to get done everyday, I'm falling behind on everything, including laundry.. I think that I'm only going to wash my laundry, since Travis has got more than enough clothes and stuff to last him until next week.. It might sound mean, but ya know what? He doesn't seem to care whether he is clean or not, so whats the point anymore?!
With that said, I'm doing okay.. I've worn myself out.. I'm so tired, yet can't seem to sleep. Its a strange position to be in.. Its like in my mind, I have tons of things that I'd like to do. For instance, I'd like to go for a walk, I'd like to learn to jog, I'd like to start doing my aerobic step and stuff again.. I miss it!! So with that said, I think that tomorrow, I'm going to do it again.. Why? Why not?! I'd like to do it.. :-) Well I'm going to sit down, and take a look at my classes, and whats due tomorrow, and setup a schedule based on whats going on tomorrow.. I haven't heard from Nita, so I'm assuming that we won't be meeting on Thursday, instead I'll be meeting with Hannah on Saturday!! I"m so excited about that!! Whoo Hooo!!! :D
Well I guess I will be posting more, as the night goes on... :) For some reason, I feel as though we are going to get a surprise sometime soon here.. I hope its a good surprise, cuz if not, I'll have to kill someone!! ROFL.. As if I could do that... Anyway I'm going to go, and figure out my plan for tomorrow.. As I said, if I need too, I'll be posting more tonight.. :d
True Annoyances...
Well its 11:00 and I'm already annoyed.. Its not to the point of yelling or screaming, or even of setting up some sort of protest.. However, for me this is getting quite annoying... Travis stayed up all night, literally, never even bothered to come to bed to get some sleep, so when I woke up at 9 am here he was sitting in the recliner, with earphones on, and sleeping. Isn't that wonderful? Why did we even bother getting a King Sized bed?! I mean seriously.. I'm extremely annoyed at this point..
So I woke him up, and was feeling good, and figured, sweet, I have all morning, and early afternoon to get things done.. However, Travis has different plans.. He went straight to bed!! So with that, I'm sitting here with the music on, and am going to focus on getting my school work done, since I have tons of assignments to do today. With that said, tomorrow is my day off, and it will be national house cleaning day!! It will also be planting day, and I'm hoping to get to Eau Claire here in a while, to get some more lilac bushes!! Mac, loves them, so I"m going to get a few more for the front yard/side yard.. Ya know? Something really nice that we can plant, to really brighten up our front yard, and maybe around my stoop as well.. :d I'm hoping to leave here to do that around 12:30... So that'll be in an hour and 1/2.. Maybe he'll wake up and take me at that time, if not then I will be forced to find a ride with someone else.. Maybe I can call into work? Nah.. Well I will find a way to get them, even if that means that I have to take the cab partially and walk the rest of the way!! Seriously... Free Lilac bushes aren't something to walk away from!! :D
So here I sit annoyed, and concerned that nothing is going to get done.. At all today.. Since its obvious that Travis is allowing his depression, and unsuccessful life corrupt all the awesome things that God has given us here.. I mean seriously.. What the heck?!
Well I'm going to go for now, to log into school stuff, and get all of my schoolwork hopefully at least started, and things, before I have to go to work at 3:00... :D I will post more here in a while.. I'm sure :D
So I woke him up, and was feeling good, and figured, sweet, I have all morning, and early afternoon to get things done.. However, Travis has different plans.. He went straight to bed!! So with that, I'm sitting here with the music on, and am going to focus on getting my school work done, since I have tons of assignments to do today. With that said, tomorrow is my day off, and it will be national house cleaning day!! It will also be planting day, and I'm hoping to get to Eau Claire here in a while, to get some more lilac bushes!! Mac, loves them, so I"m going to get a few more for the front yard/side yard.. Ya know? Something really nice that we can plant, to really brighten up our front yard, and maybe around my stoop as well.. :d I'm hoping to leave here to do that around 12:30... So that'll be in an hour and 1/2.. Maybe he'll wake up and take me at that time, if not then I will be forced to find a ride with someone else.. Maybe I can call into work? Nah.. Well I will find a way to get them, even if that means that I have to take the cab partially and walk the rest of the way!! Seriously... Free Lilac bushes aren't something to walk away from!! :D
So here I sit annoyed, and concerned that nothing is going to get done.. At all today.. Since its obvious that Travis is allowing his depression, and unsuccessful life corrupt all the awesome things that God has given us here.. I mean seriously.. What the heck?!
Well I'm going to go for now, to log into school stuff, and get all of my schoolwork hopefully at least started, and things, before I have to go to work at 3:00... :D I will post more here in a while.. I'm sure :D
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Somewhat Frustrated...
Well today was another good day.. Or was it? For some reason, things just seemed a little bit against me being overly happy and energized.. Go figure.. So this girl at work, Candice.. She has been bad mouthing me at work. So I told Cheryl and she told me that I had to report that to Mary. I guess I should, although I don't really wanna cause a whole thing over me, ya know? Especially if I am going to be going to hardlines 3 days a week!! So I'm totally excited about that.. However, when I got home today, its like Travis is hypnotized by Fallout 3.. Seriously.. He stays up all night, and plays Fallout 3, and then when he gets up in the morning, thats what he turns on.. Why are we even paying for Netflix?! Seriously?! Then he got all mad at me, cuz I wanted him to help me plant the plants that we got, and wanted him to go to the community garden to help me water, and pull weeds, but instead he was worried about his fallout 3.. I hope that the Xbox goes back to the red ring of death, so that way he can't play the damn game!!
I don't wanna sound negative here, cuz I have been doing so good.. However, Travis is being so lazy.. He hasn't applied for work since he's gotten home.. Seriously he hasn't. Plus, he doesn't want to clean up the house or anything. He sits here each and everyday, and does literally nothing. However, I am doing a lot better than I used to. I'm working, and doing my school work, and am gardening every other day. I'm also cleaning up the house, and cooking dinner, etc.. I'm going to try to do a step workout tomorrow, and am going to start walking again on top of that. I'm doing much better, and am feeling much better, with each and everyday. I'm really feeling much better about how things are going. God has blessed us each and everyday. He has stood by me, and by us, and is making our lives better, each and everyday. I'm so blessed and happy to know that God is with me.. God is with us!! Praise God for everything that we have!!
I'm excited to say that this week, is going to be full of adventure and busyness... I'm really happy and excited to say that tomorrow morning, I'm going to start my bible studies again. I'm also excited to say that I know that God is with me, I can feel Him here with me. I am working to make God proud of me, after all He is my Father. He is the only one that I need to make happy, and be satisfied with!! So with that said, I'm going to go jump in the shower, and get ready for bed.. First though, I'm going to post on Chippewa Freecycle for a few things that I'm needing to help re-decorate the house, and things.. Like we need sheets!! :D
All I wanna say right now, is Praise God!! :D
I don't wanna sound negative here, cuz I have been doing so good.. However, Travis is being so lazy.. He hasn't applied for work since he's gotten home.. Seriously he hasn't. Plus, he doesn't want to clean up the house or anything. He sits here each and everyday, and does literally nothing. However, I am doing a lot better than I used to. I'm working, and doing my school work, and am gardening every other day. I'm also cleaning up the house, and cooking dinner, etc.. I'm going to try to do a step workout tomorrow, and am going to start walking again on top of that. I'm doing much better, and am feeling much better, with each and everyday. I'm really feeling much better about how things are going. God has blessed us each and everyday. He has stood by me, and by us, and is making our lives better, each and everyday. I'm so blessed and happy to know that God is with me.. God is with us!! Praise God for everything that we have!!
I'm excited to say that this week, is going to be full of adventure and busyness... I'm really happy and excited to say that tomorrow morning, I'm going to start my bible studies again. I'm also excited to say that I know that God is with me, I can feel Him here with me. I am working to make God proud of me, after all He is my Father. He is the only one that I need to make happy, and be satisfied with!! So with that said, I'm going to go jump in the shower, and get ready for bed.. First though, I'm going to post on Chippewa Freecycle for a few things that I'm needing to help re-decorate the house, and things.. Like we need sheets!! :D
All I wanna say right now, is Praise God!! :D
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)